Sunday, October 26, 2008

They're mad for Mad Libs at Hogwarts!

Me? Not so much. But, as there are points involved, I'll do it. Remember the list I posted a few days ago?

1. Name of a male professor at Hogwarts - Remus Lupin
2. A subject at Hogwarts - Charms
3. A prime number between 53 and 1000 - 59
4. A professor at Hogwarts (either gender) - Minerva McGonagall
5. A body part - a leg
6. A verb - to swim
7. Your character name - Penelope Clearwater
8. Your favorite Quidditch team - Moose Jaw Meteorites
9. Someone (or someones) you'd find in a portrait at Hogwarts - Sir Cadogan
10. A number between 1 and 7 - 5
11. 20 minus your answer for #10 - 15
12. A craft (noun) - knit
13. A Hogwarts House other than Hufflepuff - Ravenclaw
14. Something they'd sell in Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes that makes a big mess, loud noise, lots of smoke, or general nuisance - Portable Swamp.
15. The character name of another swapper in HSKS6 - Emma Wigworthy
16. A subject at Hogwarts - Ancient Runes.

This is where they come into play:

Run, Hufflepuff, Run!

Professor Lupin was having a terrible morning, and it wasn't even breakfast yet. Someone broke into the Charms classroom the night before, hid a Boggart in the closet, and set loose 59 doxies. How did he know there were 59 doxies? Because each one took a bite out of his leg as he tried to capture it, and Madame Pomfrey had to swim each wound separately. And comment annoyingly about how Professor Minerva McGonagall would've had the room cleared out with 2 waves of a wand.

It took forever to get out of the infirmary, and by then Professor Lupin was in a foul mood. Luckily, he knew how to improve it: by finding the culprits and making him, her or them pay. Lupin had overheard some students giggling in the hallways the other day about Penelope Clearwater's stash of doxy eggs, so he had a good idea of who to interrogate first. Unfortunately for him, but rather fortunately for Penelope Clearwater, the common room password had recently been changed to Moose Jaw Meteorites, so Lupin couldn't enter. Sir Cadogan looked up from his portrait and laughed at the cursing, frustrated Professor.

The old Professor Lupin would have thrown a hissy fit at being taunted by a mere portrait, and blasted the thing all the way into the 5th floor girl's bathroom. The new Professor Lupin went to 15 weeks of Anger Management classes, punched a lot of pillows, and took up knitting. And started subscribing to the Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes catalogue.

Professor Lupin's first class of the day was Charms with the 3rd year Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws. It took them 2 hours to clean up after the entire carton of Portable Swamps that went off and clung to their robes, schoolbooks, and any exposed flesh. The students all knew that Penelope was planning to do something in Charms to get Professor Lupin, so everyone blamed her for the prank and gave her the cold shoulder for 17 days, until Emma Wigworthy blew up the Ancient Runes classroom with a misplaced charm and became the new pariah-of-the-hour.

Silly but - it is just high school!

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